Valentine's Day: The Hallmark Holiday

I remember the anxiety and awkwardness of dating; and not just dating in general, but dating a girl for only a few weeks to a month knowing that Valentine’s Day was just around the corner. If you are interested in the young lady you don’t want to seem too over zealous. If not interested, you don’t want to seem too uninterested for fear that she will get the hint and soon you’ll be at home alone on Saturday night wondering how you blew the best thing that could have happened to you (or at least you’ll be thinking that at the time).

So February 14th arrives and you are armed with flowers, perhaps some chocolates, a card (maybe with a cute poem inside) and a small gift wrapped box. You escort your date to a cozy little Italian restaurant (because you’d actually listened when she was discussing her favorite fare previously) for a nice, and hopefully romantic, dinner. Dinner comes and goes, as does dessert, and you are awaiting the uncomfortable moment of exchanging gifts. Should you go first? Should she? Then simultaneously you hand her your small gift wrapped box and she hands you a slightly larger one but nearly equal in weight. The sound of paper tearing fills the room followed by the gasps that can only be made of a girl staring at diamond earrings. Meanwhile, you are searching for some complementary words to utter to mask your disappointment as you hold up a scarf that is remarkably akin to one your grandmother knitted for you when you were ten. At that precise moment, taking only nanoseconds to process, you quickly add up the cost of the flowers, earrings, chocolate, the card and dinner (including the additional bottle of wine just ordered) and wonder who the hell this St. Valentine is that started this crappy tradition. Obviously wedding bells may not be in the immediate future and you are left feeling more like you were on the receiving end at the St. Valentine’s Day massacre. Yet you sit there and wonder how this stupid tradition started (while she’s trying on the earrings of course).

Valentine’s Day is named after two Christian martyrs named Valentine and became associated with romantic love in the Middle Ages when courtly love (not to be confused with Courtney Love) flourished.

Far better known than the Saint Valentines is Valentinius of Alexandria. His Gnostic teaching was highly influential and was a candidate for Bishop of Rome. He spoke of the marriage bed assuming the central place in his interpretation of Christian love. This was in direct contrast to the austere views of Christianity at the time.

The middle of February became associated with love and fertility back in ancient times. The period between mid-January and mid-February was the month of Gamelion on the ancient Athens calendar. Gamelion was dedicated to the sacred marriage of Zeus and Hera.

February 15th in Rome marked a celebration called Lupercalia, named after the legendary wolf that suckled Romulus and Remus. Activities of the festival included noble youths and magistrates running up and down the streets naked for sport. Many women of status would purposely get in their way and be reprimanded by being struck on the hands, believing that those that were pregnant would be aided in delivery, and those that were barren become pregnant. Lupercalia was abolished in 496 by Pope Gelasius but in its stead declared that the feast of St. Valentine would be celebrated on February 14th.

A High Court of Love was established in Paris on Valentine’s Day in 1400. The court heard matters including love contract disputes, betrayals and violence against women. The judges were selected by women based on their poetry reading prowess.

The earliest record of a valentine is said to be a poem written by Charles, Duke of Orleans to his wife during his incarceration in the Tower of London after his capture at the Battle of Agincourt.

It is speculated that the legends of St. Valentine began during the 1400’s including:

· Valentine passed a love note to his jailer’s daughter that read “From your Valentine” on the eve before he was to be martyred.

· St. Valentine arranged marriages in secret as a ban of marriage was placed on Roman Soldiers by Emperor Claudius II.

The United States has dubbed Valentine’s Day as a Hallmark Holiday. It is estimated by the Greeting Card Association that approximately one billion valentines are sent each year making it the second largest holiday for card sending outside of Christmas. I t is thought that Valentine’s Day was brought to North America by British settlers around the 19th century. Esther Howland of Worcester, Massachusetts is credited as being the first in the United States to mass-produce valentines of embossed paper lace back in 1847. Soon, the tradition of exchanging cards expanded to include gifts such as roses and chocolates. And not to be outdone, the diamond industry began promoting gift giving in the form of jewelry.

It is at that point that realize that big-business advertising does work as you quietly sit there and fasten a noose out of your scarf.